What are some of the most interesting shower thoughts you have had?

Discussion in 'Off Topic Chat' started by NamanKapoor, Jan 14, 2019.

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  1. NamanKapoor

    NamanKapoor New Member

    I am sharing 46 interesting shower thoughts. I got them from my life.
    1. If we had the ability to fly, we would not do it so often as it would be considered exercise.
    2. A 5 minutes sleep in feels so much more valuable than going to bed 5 minutes earlier.
    3. Someday Apple will probably bring back the headphone jack and market it as a high-fidelity audio port
    4. Pornhub keeps being mentioned as being huge in terms of users, but they must be counting every user multiple time as they're all in incognito mode and don't save cookies
    5. The smarter you are the more stupid people you have to deal with.
    6. You are paid by how hard you are to replace. Not by how hard you work.
    7. Funerals are basically family reunions minus one person.
    8. No one in history has ever “saved a life”, they have only delayed the death.
    9. You aren’t afraid of being alone in the dark. You are afraid of not being alone in the dark.
    10. If you have a Wikipedia page, you’ve either succeeded in life or fucked up pretty bad
    11. porn has probably prevented more births than condoms and the pill combined.
    12. Removing ‘read’ or ‘seen’ from texts and DMs would lessen the level of anxiety in the world.
    13. You're finally an adult when you have a net loss from the holidays instead of a net gain
    14. When we sleep, our brains have enough power to generate its own reality in dreams. When we’re awake, it doesn’t have enough power to remember why we walked into a room.
    15. There are pornstars who are literally born in 2000.
    16. A date is like a sex interview.
    17. The reason you wake up when you die in a dream is because your brain doesn’t have any idea what happens after.
    18. If Jesus were born today, DNA tests would prove who the father was.
    19. On a clear day you can see about 4 miles into the horizon, but on a clear night you can 16 thousand light years away.
    20. Aliens invaded the Moon on July 20th, 1969
    21. Time heals everything, yet it also slowly kills you
    22. If an alien finds us, I wonder how they’d react to our memes.
    23. thoughts which include something happened in shower are not shower thoughts
    24. Actual coke is diet by default
    25. Your tongue never sits comfortably in your mouth
    26. If you clean up a mess after an ant has already left to report back to his colony you're essentially making him look like a liar
    27. The sinking of the Titanic must have been a miracle to the lobsters in the kitchen
    28. Spinning in circles to get dizzy as a child was my first attempt at getting high
    29. Slow deaths are said to be the most painful, and life itself is really just one big slow death
    30. If oil is dead dinosaurs then our cars are powered by dinosaur juice
    31. After December 31 1999. there were no more children born in 20th century. let that sink in
    32. All superheroes real super power is bladder control.
    33. Anxiety is like when video game combat music is playing but you can't find any enemies.
    34. Replying "k" in Morse "-_-", has the same passive aggressive tone
    35. Single player games that don't require internet are going to be extremely valuable during the apocalypse
    36. Google Earth, in all its detail, is an unprecedented accomplishment for mankind. No one even a hundred years ago would believe it could exist. But the fact that it is free, is a world wonder.
    37. If race horses could comprehend that victory meant a lifetime of leisure and sex, they'd probably run even faster
    38. Pinterest is like a virus that infected the google image search.
    39. people with anxiety are basically way too aware of being alive
    40. If penis size was as obvious as breast size the world would be a very different place
    41. If Apple manufactured clothing they'd probably have all the belt loops on their jeans a different size than normal, so you'd also have to buy an Apple Belt.
    42. If I see Google in a show/movie I think nothing of it, but if I see Bing, I know its paid promotion
    43. The only people forced to see anti-piracy warnings are the people who don't pirate movies.
    44. Referring to your employees as "family" is the corporate equivalent to telling a prostitute you love her
    45. Condoms are made by automated assembly lines, meaning robots are already helping to prevent human reproduction.
    46. Being lonely is believing you've received a message when it's just your battery at 15%
     
  2. .Surf.

    .Surf. Well-Known Member

    You must be taking a long shower if you have all this ideas.
     
    NamanKapoor likes this.
  3. NamanKapoor

    NamanKapoor New Member

    Haha...I do take very long showers
     
  4. Hermanator

    Hermanator Well-Known Member

    Were you drunk when you took a shower?
     
    NamanKapoor likes this.
  5. NamanKapoor

    NamanKapoor New Member

    Nah, non-alcoholic✌
     
  6. imReqi

    imReqi Well-Known Member

    Good material. Keep writing and polishing it. Some good comedic nuggets in there to develop.
     
    NamanKapoor likes this.
  7. Hermanator

    Hermanator Well-Known Member

    Sorry if I can't remember a deep-sounding shower thought. I usually only analyze facts or mechanisms when I take a shower.
     
    NamanKapoor likes this.
  8. NamanKapoor

    NamanKapoor New Member

    Thanks dude
     
  9. cubeover

    cubeover New Member

    Most CxO only measure Money, but then only talk about (not measure) Value. The two are often conflated, which is a mistake. True metric is their Ratio.
     
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